the condom got lost in my hair
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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