I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
She even gives head with a lisp.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
