she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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