what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
