He kissed a someone with a penis
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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