I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Found your dick twin last night
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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