He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
