meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
