My friends, they love my intelligence
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I believe in your delicious
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
