You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
and she was petting her beer can
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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