Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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