Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
