I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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