dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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