I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
