Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize