Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
