scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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