I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize