I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Swine flu is the new snow day.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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