if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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