I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
