and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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