Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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