He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
