mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Your tits are I can't wait for
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
