Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
