Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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