im so drunk with asians
where?
always
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize