are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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