stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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