Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
