I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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