My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
farters have to be the big spoon...
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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