The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize