I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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