The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
