My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
