there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
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