I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
