And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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