I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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