I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
soo... how was my night?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
