No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
