I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
