I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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