Having a random hookup so left but love u
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Randomize
