arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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