put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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