ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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