I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize